When we first hear of tantra, most of us automatically think of sex. I think it’s important to break this misconception.
Improving sex life is a part of it, but tantric meditation for couples is much more than a sexual practice. Deeper and more sensual sex is only a result of the greater intimacy and understanding between partners, which then naturally benefits all aspects of the relationship.
Tantric meditation is an ancient practice. When couples do it together, it can boost both of their spiritual journeys as well as deepen and heal their connection.
In this article, we’re going to discuss:
If you’re keen to try tantric meditation for couples with your partner, share this article with them.
Simply learning about these things together can be a great way to work on your relationship.
What is Tantric Meditation for Couples?
As with all other tantric practices, tantric meditation for couples is built on the idea that our bodies hold aspects of the divine.
The techniques aim to help us reconnect with our inner being, which is one with the rest of the universe.
Shakti is our sensual, expressive, raw, creative, and grounded side, while Shiva is transcendental. The idea of Mother Earth and Father Sky seems to extend throughout nearly all spiritual practices.
We need both energies and tantric meditation for couples can help you and your partner to balance and express your full spectrum.
In this way, tantra relates to the principal idea of yoga as well, working on unifying the mind, soul, and body. At the same time, we are primal and spiritual, connected to both the material, natural, and spiritual, and divine worlds.With consistent practice of tantric meditation, you will create harmony between these elements.
Furthermore, tantra also helps you with sexuality. It makes you more present and aware so you and your partner can practice mindful intercourse which can be just as healing as it is satisfying.
Even in sex, focusing on the physical aspect alone doesn’t bring us the fullness of connection and pleasure. Becoming present, aware, and heart-centered takes it to a new level.
Tantric meditation for couples does this through multiple exercises and working with chakras.
This is where it differs from some other forms of meditation. Rather than focusing on relaxation and emptying the mind, it is more physical and works with energy. This is where it can be helpful for those who struggle with other forms of meditation.
We will introduce these techniques soon. But first, let’s dive deeper into the benefits.
Benefits of Tantric Meditation For Couples
There are many benefits of tantric meditation for couples both for the individual and the couple as a whole. Here we will go through the main reasons to add it to your practice.
- Tried and true – this is not exactly a benefit, but I think it is important to note that this practice, in one way or another, has lasted for thousands of years, and was a part of all big spiritual systems of the East, including Buddhism, Taoism, Hinduism and Yoga. When something stands for so long, you know it’s not just another trend or fad – it works.
- It relieves blocked energy and emotions, which helps to overcome recurring problems within yourself and between you and your partner.
- It improves intimacy and connection between partners, which is particularly helpful for long-term relationships. It connects you on a deeper, energetic, and spiritual level.
- It awakens sexual desire and increases libido. It can help you freshen up your passion for each other while also making you more and more connected the longer you pursue it – the opposite of the honeymoon effect.
- Awareness increases in both partners, and both of you will deepen your understanding of yourselves. This can help with codependency in relationships, but also with individual self-esteem, self-respect, and self-confidence.
- It can be a self-help ritual for stress, anxiety, and depression. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable, you are releasing all inner toxicity and reaching a state of bliss.
- Simply making the practice consistent can help you with discipline, but it also aids with productivity on a mental level, improving your focus, memory, and performance.
- It makes you more compassionate, and loving and opens your mind and heart to hear and understand each other, and other people.
4 Tantric Meditation For Couples Techniques
Breathing is the foundation of all tantric practices. We use our breath to work with our energy, to become present, and to increase our awareness.
We mentioned we all have the physical, primal (shakti), and spiritual, divine (shiva) aspects within ourselves. Breathing acts as a bridge between the two.
When two people are doing breathwork together, the practice goes beyond just a breath pattern, it is important to find a connection between you. We’ll offer some tools you can use for that.
Here is a breathing technique you cloud try:
- Start by setting up the space. You can do this together, burn incense, light a candle, and make it cozy and warm.
- Sit in a pose for meditation facing each other. Make sure you are comfortable, you can sit cross-legged, kneeling, prop yourselves on a cushion, or sit up in chairs if that works best.
- Set your intentions for the practice. Think for a bit then share with each other what you would like to focus on in this meditation. You can close your eyes and visualize the outcome you wish to have in this meditation coming true. There is enough space for both of your intentions to be taken into account.
- Try to establish a mental or emotional connection. You can visualize the same thing, or simply focus as much on your partner as you do on yourself. A connection will naturally deepen as you start breathing and meditating, you don’t have to feel any pressure.
- When you both feel connected and ready, begin to breathe. As you breathe, visualize the light of energy flowing through you and your partner, up and down through the chakras.
- As you go along, you can try to breathe simultaneously, but this is not crucial. If it happens, happens, but sending good intentions to your partner and being present is more important.
You can do this practice for as long as you’d like.
2. Heart to Heart Hug
After you tune into each other with breathing, you can move to physical touch. I will describe several techniques. You can but don’t have to do all of them. See what fits you both best.
The first technique is heart-to-heart hug.
As the name implies, you will hug and listen to each other’s heartbeat, and feel each other as you breathe.
- In a seated position, hug each other as tightly as you can.
- Relax into the hug, while still keeping each other close.
- With each inhale and exhale, try to visualize your partner receiving compassion, love and comfort. Feel their presence.
Who doesn’t love spooning? It’s a lovely alternative to seated hugging.
- Lie in bed, on your side. One partner will hug the other from the back.
- Touch heart to heart, trying to align your bodies so your chakras are on the same levels. You can use cushions for help.
- Start breathing, having the same intention as in the seated hug, or focus on sending energy to the partner with the exhales, and accepting it with the inhales.
- If you’d like you can also switch positions after a while.
Hug or spoon for as long as you both enjoy it. Don’t rush it, relax and take your time.
The alternative version of a heart-to-heart hug, yab-yum is an ancient traditional technique, which promotes awareness. The position represents the union of Shiva and Shakti.
Here’s how to do it:
- Sit facing each other.
- The heavier partner sits in a crosslegged position, and the lighter person sits on their thighs, crossing their legs behind their partner’s back.
- The posture encourages an upright seat while also keeping you close to each other.
- Gaze into each other eyes, and breathe together. Return your mind to presence whenever you wander off.
Since the partner’s chakras are aligned and they’re able to gaze into each other’s eyes or touch their third eye chakras together, this yab-yum is also a traditional position for tantric sex.
4. Working with the Chakras
The tantra works with the energy, and you can help each other to feel, balance, and connect to your chakras. This can bring a sense of release and even a euphoric experience.
Visualizing a flow of light energy through each other’s bodies as we described in the breathwork guide is a fantastic way to do it.
You can also extend the right arm towards each other’s heart, keeping it slightly away from their skin. Then imagine sending healing and loving energy to your partner through your open palms.
You can do this in silence, or if you’d like you can speak to each other, saying positive thoughts, intentions, and affirmations.
If you feel like it, or your partner asks you to do so, you can move your hand up and down your partner’s body, and send energy to other energy centers as well.
A relationship between two people who are working on their consciousness is the most beautiful of them all.
And doing things together can deepen your connection and elevate your individual journeys.
Tantric meditation is great for that, as it works on so many levels – affecting your mind, body, spirit, and relationship.
And if you are looking for more info on Tantra or Kundalini, here are some great reads: